Thomas L. Korkmas

The Power Of “NO”

We have all been conditioned by marketing to think “Yes” because “No” is “negative”.  Advertisers constantly tell us that:  “yes, we can get you into a car even if you have bad credit or bankruptcy.”  We are conditioned as children to do as our parents tell us and to say “yes”.  Saying “no” is implied to be detrimental for our psyche and hurts those around us.  Most employees say “yes” even when they know there may be unintended consequences because only the most intelligent bosses allow subordinates to say “no” and listen to the reason.

To be successful in life we need to know when to say “yes” and when to say “no”.   The power to deny has great negotiating power and signals that we are thinkers and know what is in our best interest.  Would you sell products or services at a price below break even just to make the customer happy?

Apologizing for saying “no” is one of the greatest mistakes made by service providers.  We should not apologize for the fees we charge or for the cost of our products.  If you feel guilty for saying no you should identify the source of the feeling and address it accordingly.  To clarify, explaining price is far different than apologizing and you should never let anyone know your exact pricing components.

A professional and succinct response impresses clients and requires them to explain why you should say “yes”.  If we are challenged when we say “no”, simply respond that “to say yes is not in our best interest”.  Let the other party explain why it is in your best interest.  If they cannot convince you that it is in your interest, then it is likely not.

Beyond business we are often asked to donate our time and money to organizations and causes and these are worthy undertakings if they do not cause us to create conflicts with others.

All rules have exceptions, such as when someone has done you a favor and politeness requires that you return the favor.

Learn to say “no” graciously and do not feel guilty, it is part of growing up and a necessary lifelong business and social skill.

Dispute Avoidance Advice: On choosing a business partner, supplier or client

No one goes into business to fail but disputes and eventual failure often occur because we chose to have a relationship with someone whose character was not a primary consideration. 
A handshake with someone that we really do not know is often the first step to business failure, grief and general angst.
It is necessary to really get to know someone to know their character but there are some clear indicators that are easily observed.   Let us take a look at what constitutes “Character.”

CHARACTER

Character is generally described as the combined moral and ethical structure of a person.  Most definitions of character include the four cardinal virtues.  The cardinal virtues are:

Justice:  Acting with moral rightness, equity, honor, fairness, fair handling, due reward or treatment.

Prudence:  Discretion, careful management, economy, caution, and wisdom.  Specifically, prudence implies not only caution but the capacity of judging in advance the probable results of one’s action.  Discretion relates to self-restraint and sound judgment.  Circumspection adds the implication of wariness in one’s actions out of consideration for social and moral consequences.

Fortitude:  Strength of mind that allows one to endure pain or adversity with courage.

Temperance:  Moderation, self restraint or abstinence.

Important consideration-If we are looking at others, what are they seeing in us?  What is your character?  Would your clients, friends, acquaintances or employer attribute any of the above virtues (characteristics) to you?  Would they apply them to certain areas and not to others? 

Do not base future performance based on previous experience.

Character is influenced by culture and upbringing.  An individual with poor character may represent the general culture and a lack of instilling of the core virtues into the person when he/she was maturing. 

A person may have had “character” but the pressures of meeting payrolls, monthly obligations, bank loans and an unforeseeable economy can slowly, or rapidly, erode character.  It is easy to rationalize (self-satisfying but incorrect reasoning) improper behavior or actions when under extreme stress or when greed or pride interferes with rational thinking (reasoned and/or logical).

Many business mistakes have been made because one tends to trust those that he meets at business and professional meetings, charitable events, political gatherings and perhaps most disarming of all, at a religious gathering.  One wise person observed that a Church is a hospital for sinners, the only difference between the churchgoers and the rest of the population is that they recognize that they have failures and faults.

Ronald Reagan said:  “Trust but verify” and this applies to every business venture and relationship that we enter.  That is why we use credit reports, references and criminal background searches.

Check them out today and have fewer regrets tomorrow.

The Houston Business Show Is Proud to Introduce the New Advisor, Larry Korkmas

Larry Korkmas was born in Tyler, Texas and graduated from East Texas State University in 1968 with a degree in business administration.  He served in the United State Army from 1968 to 1970.  He met his wife Carolyn at East Texas, they married in 1968 and lived in Europe for a year and a half.

They returned to Texas and Larry became the fiscal officer for the Small Business Administration’s disaster loan program as a result of Hurricane Celia hitting Corpus Christi.  First hand observation of the results of Hurricane Celia and the Los Angeles Earthquake made him keenly aware of the challenges of business recovery and disaster planning.

After a year in Corpus Christi, they moved to Denver with SBA and shortly thereafter, Larry became a real estate appraiser and broker and had his own company until 1981 when he went to work for the Pittsburg and Midway Coal Company, a division of Gulf Oil Corporation.  He was transferred to Beckley, West Virginia in the heart of Appalachia for the purpose of acquiring other coal companies and coal reserves.

In 1983, he was transferred to Houston with the promotion to Manager of Leasing for Gulf’s worldwide real estate operations. He was also part of the team that developed and maintained Gulf’s disaster and business recovery operations.  He worked with the Chevron merger team when Gulf was acquired by Chevron and then crossed the street and spent over seven years as Manager of Real Estate for Cooper Industries.

In 1991, he decided to do something daring at 45 years and enrolled in the executive MBA program at Houston Baptist University and graduated in 1993.

After graduating from HBU Larry, seeking a career change, sought the advice of a number of friends, clients and business associates.  He was advised to consider the emerging profession of mediation, primarily because he had been able to avoid incurring a single lawsuit during his entire career and settled many other suits brought against the companies he worked for.

In addition to mediation and real estate, Larry is an advisor to several mid-size businesses and provides them with updates on changes in negotiation strategy, banking, insurance, power, technology, business politics, continuity planning and emerging trends.  In the late 1990s, he was called on again to develop disaster and business recovery plans and is still involved in this activity.

Several years after graduating from HBU, Larry was invited back to teach in the business school and the graduate human resources program.   He still teaches there as an adjunct professor.

A prolific writer, a number of his articles have appeared in various real estate publications including Red News and he has authored a number of MCE commercial real estate courses.

Larry is the owner of Commercial Dispute Resolution Associates, a mediation and arbitration provider and is still active in the commercial and industrial real estate business.